I'm giving all my flying fucks away...

As a single white male living in the United States, there's a lot of supposedly important political issues in this country that I've come to realize don't have any discernible impact on me whatsoever. For instance, all this business I'm hearing nowadays about the Supreme Court and the President's choice for a new Supreme Court justice. After a lot of thought, I've finally decided that it just doesn't matter to me. In fact, I could give a flying fuck about Supreme Court justices. I could take a fuck that was just flying around the room and give it away to whomever wanted it. And I wouldn't even ask for anything in return. I'd say, "Hey, folks, step right up and get your free flying fuck! It's free, I tells ya!" And people would be like, "I'd like a free flying fuck. May I have your flying fuck?" And I'd say, "Well, are you sure? This particular flying fuck is about Supreme Court justices." And they'd reply, "Oh, that's OK. As long as it's free, I'll take any flying fuck." Then I'd give it away.

In fact, I have a lot of flying fucks that I could give. To name a few, I could give a flying fuck about health care, a flying fuck about gay marriage, a flying fuck about abortion rights, a flying fuck about Social Security, a flying fuck about campaign finance reform, a flying fuck about tort reform, a flying fuck about leaking the names of CIA operatives, a flying fuck about the new Pope, a flying fuck about the space shuttle, and I could give a great big flying fuck to some lucky lady about this joke of a war on terror. Hey, flying fucks for everybody!

Hmm, I wonder if I could collect all of my flying fucks in a big bird cage (so they don't fly away) and then put them in a Salvation Army or Goodwill collection box. They could resell the flying fucks for, like, a quarter apiece.

By the way, I should point out here that some people like to keep their fucks. They'll say, "I don't give a fuck about that!" And then they keep their fuck, which seems rather selfish. If people want my shit, though, they're out of luck because I don't give a shit. So maybe I'm not one to talk about selfishness.

Fuck, I'm tired as shit. Later.